It was a typical day. Things were somewhat calm, which was slightly unusual because usually calm was not a word to describe things within the walls of Hogwarts. There was activity, the footsteps could be heard no matter which corridor one walked down. Today she'd acted simply on impulse. It was almost ritualistic to come to the Owlery at least once a week. It was there where she'd send off letters home. One to her mum, One to her beloved father, and one to Tuney. To her big sister whom didn't seem to care one bit about anything she'd had to say. It hurt, far more than she ever let on, that disappointment. How they were once oh so close and now, they were worse than strangers. Strangers living in the same family home. Which hurt far more than she could ever explain.

Her heart raced as she walked up those stairs, knowing full well the heartache that was most likely in store for her once she got there. Sure Mother and Father both meant well, telling her that her sister loved her and missed her and that all was well at home. She knew better. Tuney didn't care. If she had, well she'd have written by now.  Pushing that thought out of her mind, she knew what she had to do. All that was needed was a moment or two of silence. It was only about the time that she had gotten close to the Owlery's door, that she could smell the owls. They probably all could use some refreshments. Some little treats or pellets. Maybe even some water.

It hadn't even dawned on her that someone else might be here. With the same intention as she had. To send word home. Opening the door, she walked in. It was clear that her instincts were right. She wouldn't be alone. Was this a problem? Hardly. She didn't say anything as she walked over to the owl she'd always used upon entrance into Hogwarts. Tying the letters to it's leg, she sighed briefly before feeding the owl a pellet or two. "You know where to go. Take these home. Please." And with that, she watched as the owl took off.

It was nice seeing the room sort of cleaned up, without seeing all the droppings. She cleared her throat, and it was only after she had walked up into the balcony. Why she went up there, she didn't really know. Perhaps it was just because of the fact that she had a lot on her mind and it, seemed like the best place to be. As whom would expect to find her there? Perhaps she hadn't expected what was to come, but it was of no consequence. She had a lot on her mind, between the trouble at home, to knowing how soon all of this, this time at Hogwarts would come to an end. Only two more years, and she'd be out the door, on her own. But which world did she really belong in? The muggle one she'd always known, or the magical, a place that she worked hard to fit in with?

Clearing her throat, she finally made it to the top. It was only as she entered the top of the tower, that she saw Sirius Black. She didn't know what to say, or what to do. So instead she just walked over to the edge, and looked out. She wasn't going to force conversation when it clearly seemed as they were both here for the same thing. To think. Yet if he wanted to talk, she'd be okay with it. They weren't exactly friends per say, but they weren't enemies either. Just simply housemates at this point, but she never shut down anyone that needed a friend. Or needed an ear. She was a good listener, and wasn't one to just tell someone's secret.

@black

There were things she knew, and just as many things she did not. Coming up here, wasn't something she'd at first planned, but she needed a place to think, and this was one of the best places to think. It had an incredible view, though usually there were not any other occupants up here. This was a first that she found herself up here, with someone else. Though, in all honesty, she and Sirius didn't have anything in common. She wasn't against him, any more than she was to anyone else. She hadn't planned of course on making herself known, at first. It wasn't like she needed him to know she was there. It wouldn't matter either way. She knew whom he was, a prankster, and Potter's best friend. His best friend had had affections if one could call it that, for her. Something she still didn't quite accept. How could she?

It wasn't like she didn't notice Potter, or anything. She tried not to. She wasn't going to be like every other girl in school and throw herself at him. Sure he was good looking but, that wasn't what she cared for. There had to be more than that, right? No, she had come up here, not because of Potter. At least, not entirely. But because of the fact she needed to clear her head. Of what Tuney had caused, of what she worried for, with Severus. She understood that there were pranks, that were funny, though she'd hid the fact she found some humorous, because of whom they were aimed at. She knew that Severus hated when she came to his aid, because of what it made him look like, weak. But as a friend, someone that cared, she couldn't just turn her back and do nothing. She would have done that for anyone. Something she had explained to Severus more than once over the past four years. And yes, she also was aware that it wasn't just those four boys pranking him, that Severus had in fact used magic on them too. 

But, Severus wasn't her only friend at Hogwarts. Oh no, there was Marlene. Someone of whom she greatly respected. Yet, of course, she also knew that Marlene had a thing for Sirius. A certain affection as it were. Though, it was something that she kept to herself.  Marlene was like a sister to her here. And once, once you were a friend, there wasn't nothing she wouldn't do for you. It was what made her promise that she'd at least try and open herself up a little bit. She was actually surprised not to hear a quip from Sirius, because usually he was great at those.  "Well, truth be told, I needed a place to think. And this--is the place to do it. Just thinking of home. My--parents and my sister, I worry for them. My parents, they're struggling and my sister...well she hates me. All because of what I am. What about you, Sirius? I figured you and Potter would most certainly be up to something." She asked.

She had noted that he wasn't teasing, which was unusual. As that was normally a tall tale act from him. Yet the fact that he was making polite conversation was incredible in its own way. Normally she wouldn't have mentioned her parents or her sister but it kind of slipped out. The only one she expressed her worry about home about to, aside from Severus, was to Marlene.

@black

It was strange being up here. In the thick of it. The memories haunted her. The hatred, the pain...it could be consuming. She knew she wasn't the only one to have troubles at home. Even if many never expressed such things. Taking a deep breath she thought of where she had come from, and where she was going. "Yes, it is. Here, you can see everything. From the sun rising to setting each day. I'll never forget the first time I walked through the doors here at Hogwarts. Something that I never could have imagined was real. Yet it is." The truth was she was usually alone as most of her friends didn't bother coming out here. 

"When I was younger things were good. Until one day my sister and I, were at a park not far from home. I was nine. I'd always known I was different. Although I didn't know exactly how different. I remember looking down at my hand, and I formed a flower in my hand. I didn't even know it was magic. I didn't know I was a witch. And then--Severus appeared. My big sister, she hated him too. Called him...and I, a freak because of this magic. Severus was my only friend that was like I was. Sure I had other kids I saw at the park, that lived in my area. I had other friends but Severus was the only one like me. He was the one to explain--what I was. That I was a witch. He told me all about Hogwarts. So I wasn't entirely in the dark when--someone came from here, to talk to my parents about my being accepted into the school. My parents, they were proud. They stood by me. My sister did too, until...she wrote to our Headmaster and asked to attend too. When a letter arrived, telling her kindly that it couldn't happen. That was when she began to make my life miserable. She refuses to acknowledge my existence now. In fact, when I come home for the summers, she usually makes plans to stay gone throughout the entire time. We were once so close, shared everything. But now, now everything is different." 

She shook her head, trying to clear her mind of those thoughts. It was difficult to put into words to open up like how she was. But she did it. "I can't say that I'm surprised he still has homework. Though I can't say I blame you for not wanting to wait. I dropped letters off with an owl before I came up here as well." She sighed, as she listened to what he had to say. "I understand. I mean, I know I'm a muggle-born. But, I know enough of what it's like to be treated differently all because of what you are. I know that pure-bloods, don't much care for my blood as it were. Because I'm lower than dirt as they say. I can't speak for your family, nor would I want to. I can't imagine a parent that hates their children so much that they'd kick you out of the family all for believing differently. So, if you ever need anyone to talk to, or vent to, I'm all ears." She didn't know why she had told him about what it was like for her prior to Hogwarts. Would he even understand it? It was true she didn't know him that well. But, at the same time, she had this belief that she could trust him with what she was telling him. 

"It's, well it's not alright. But, my sister made her choice, and I, I have to make mine. I can't make excuses for her. I can't speak for her as to what her motives are. Mum and father both, they're struggling not just in the financial aspect, I suppose but in knowing that their children are on two ends of the spectrum. I've told my parents more than once that I want them to focus on my sister even when I'm home. That I don't want special treatment simply because I'm home. That I want father to spend one on one time with her and mother can spend time with me, and vice versa. We've not had an actual family dinner, with all four of us under one roof at the same time in four years." She cleared her throat before continuing on with what she had to say.

"Do you know what it's like coming here? When I first learned I was a witch, I was excited. And then, that incident on the train. And then, the last four years I've done everything and anything for Severus. To help. And I know, that I can't keep doing it. I've watched as you, and your mates prank Severus, for Merlin only knows what reason. Do you know why I stepped up? Because, quite honestly it is ridiculous, the odds you all put on him. two against one, sometimes four against one. I know you boys weren't the only ones using magic. He was too." A sigh escaped her lips. Knowing she couldn't expect them all to just shake hands and be friends. Civility she might ask for, but anything more than that? Was highly unlikely. "And you and Potter were the worst at it." If she was to be honest, some of the pranks they did, were humorous, but uncalled for. At least, none of them were physically dangerous. None were life-threatening. 

@black
 

Taking a deep breath, she wasn't afraid of much. Honestly things seemed to be alright now. Sure there were the headaches of what her sister caused. But it was all going to work out. It just had to. She looked out on the horizon. She loved being up here. Had since she discovered it during her first year. She was used to having company to share it with, but she would much rather deal with Sirius than James at that point. Sirius she could handle, most of the time. But James? That was like pulling teeth, painful and annoying.

"Hogwarts is something I'll never be able to replicate. It's not just the magic or the castle itself. It's the feeling. Of home, of safety. I don't really know what I'll do when it comes time to actually leave. It's felt more like home than I ever imagined. It's warm, inviting. I didn't get to grow up around magic. If I had, I don't know where I'd be. There are always surprises to find. Always, as you said, something new." It wasn't just the fact there was an invitation, saying you're welcome here, that made her feel calm here. It was something more than that. Truth be told, she didn't know in a lot of ways where she would have ended up without being here. Without the magic. Would she have been any happier? It could heal, the heart and mind in a way that nothing else could. She wasn't alone here.

It was kind of nice just sitting here and having a rather pleasant conversation with Sirius. It was surprising perhaps, as she never imagined for him to make an offer like the one he'd made, but, she had taken him up on it. Why wouldn't she? Speaking about her family was hard. Especially when it came to speaking of both her big sister and that of Severus. They lived in the same general vicinity. With her being in Cokesworth and him in Spinner's end. It was also why she had done everything she could for him.

For their friendship's sake. "Thanks, I'll keep that in mind. Same for you. If you need help with homework or anything." She would always take help when it was offered, no matter where it came from. Though would she have taken the help if it came from Potter? She would like to think she would, but that, was unknown for now.

"Blood is blood, it's--red is it not? It's ridiculous, I mean, there's really no difference. The only difference is that one grows up with the magic, and one, learns later on what they are. I'm not afraid to stand up for what I believe in. I stand for my friends, no matter who they are. Mother instilled that in me. You don't turn your back on those that matter, those that are always there for you. I understand you know that some believe in certain ways, I don't have to agree with it, but I'm not going to curse you for it." A sigh escaped her lips as she couldn't really put it to light what it was that this meant. What it meant to be outnumbered and alone.

It was a fact she didn't want to be alone. She wanted someone to be able to share her magic with, and everything that came along with it. "I think I've--I've had to come to the conclusion, that I can't do anything else. She's got to come back on her own. I can't force it, nor have I. I love my sister. I'd do anything for her--but I can't make her be okay with something she's not. I want to protect her. As crazy as that sounds. I do stress over it, not as much as I think my parents do. They've seen what this separation caused in our house. But, I'm okay with it. I have to be, right? I can't change how others deal with things." It was strange how willing she was to talk about these things. Marlene was the only one whom had been the one she'd talked about this with before then. Very few did she open up to like this.

Speaking about what it was like, of protecting Severus, she knew what a prat he could be at times. How difficult he could be. But, she loved him. Was she in love with him? No, maybe not, but she still felt strongly for him. Always would.

"I appreciate the apology Sirius. I do. I know it's not going to be easy, nor will it most likely happen over-night. Things like that take time. I understand pranks, for the most part. And I know--that what you boys do, it's all in the name of fun. I do understand that. But, there are some that aren't exactly nice to the recipient. I put myself in the situation. I could have backed off and let you boys handle it, from day one. But I was raised in if someone needs help, you don't turn your back on it. And with the odds of four against one, can you blame me? Truth be told, there's been times where I honestly thought about hexing each and every single one of you. Simply for what I've seen. But I didn't. Because I have been raised to always see the best in others. Even when they--can't see it in themselves. The one thing I can give you boys credit with, is your bond with each other. You know, you're always there for each other. And that's something that's incredible." She didn't hate any of them. She just merely disliked what they stood for, with the pranking.

@black

Truthfully, she was enjoying the conversation. Mostly because it was different than most others. They hadn't been 'friends' more or less in the past but she was willing to give that a shot. He was kind, in certain ways even if he was a bit of a prankster. She chuckled lightly thinking of the circumstances that seemed to have befallen them both. "It's because certain individuals can't or refuse to see what an individual is. You could be the smartest wizard in the world but if you're prejudiced, you're just a fool. Father taught me that. I don't care what blood-line you are, there's core values that everyone should have. Take care of yourself, and those you care for. Your friends--your family. I know that there are dark and difficult things that are coming. I can--sense that you've got it. Even if you do like to prank. You just have to know the difference between what's acceptable, and what is not. You know I'm all for having fun and enjoying things but certain pranks you know aren't so fun especially when they're a little--excessive. That puts someone in danger."

Most of her friends were muggleborn but she had a few half-blood friends and even one or two purebloods. Though it didn't matter. Blood was blood. Being pure didn't make anyone better than the others. She knew that. "Well, given the fact that I am a muggleborn. I was raised by muggles. I understand you know that some say that I--and all muggleborns just want to take something that isn't ours. But, if we weren't meant to have magic, we wouldn't. I agree, that if the muggleborns like myself, are given a class to teach us of the world we're getting ourselves into, that we'd be better prepared. I don't want to change the world I came into, you know, other than to just live my life without someone telling me what I can and can't do. Or should I say, should and shouldn't do. I don't want to change what the magical community is, or does. It's okay to be different, but it's not okay to force the change upon others. I believe it's better to learn both sides of it. The muggleborns like myself have to learn what magic is, what it's capable of. And for--those pure bloods to accept that we're a little different and that we mean no harm. No one is perfect after all." She sighed a little as she heard his words about the extremists. And also why those like herself were looked down upon. Change happens after all.

She knew he was rambling and she knew she had as well. She wasn't going to stop voicing her opinions or concerns. "Working together is the only thing that does make sense. This world is not safe for everyone when it should be. There shouldn't be anyone afraid to go out of their homes, or communities because of their differences. Well, the odds of you stopping Potter, are slim to none though I appreciate you trying to at least ease off on him. Look, I know that Severus isn't the easiest one to get along with. And I know that he's done his fair share of magic against you all as well." Honestly she knew the chances of her friend getting less likely to be picked on, was slim but it could be worse. "I would agree with you though, when it comes to my friends--they're like family. And you don't turn your back on your family. You may not like them and you don't even have to love them. But they also make you whom you are. Or at least, they shape whom you are, whether you want to be like them or not. You don't have to be blood related to be brothers. Because, although you may be born into a family that doesn't mean that you can't pick your own. But I have to ask, I noticed that you don't seem quite as close to Peter as you are with the other two. Is there a reason for that?" She asked out of simple curiosity than anything.

@black  

Truthfully it was interesting how they seemed to share certain similarities regarding blood status and the like. "I don't want you all to stop having fun. But you should be respectful of others' feelings. It's like--well disrespecting others for something they can't control, like being a werewolf or being part Veela. It's horrid. Though honestly, I know that Severus always does something just as much as you and the boys do. All I ask is for civility from both sides. You don't have to be friends although that is a nice thought. I know things like that take time." Truthfully that was a stretch imagining James, Sirius, Peter and Remus being friends with Severus. She knew that asking about Peter, was going to be a tense conversation. Even if they both seemed to be on the same page about this topic.

"I always get a different vibe about him. Have since first year. He seems a bit shy. A bit, off putting as it were. But I figured you had a reason, I mean you as a group, to want him around. He's sweet when he wants to be. But he's also--very much afraid. I see you and Potter as the ring-leaders. You're the ones that comes up with the plan, Peter just tags along and then Remus sort of watches out and ensures you won't get in trouble. Though he's not as much of an active participant as you'd like him to be. But he does what makes him comfortable. Because you're his friend. And he doesn't want to do anything that might push you all away. He's never said anything but....I can sense certain things. You know?" She paused momentarily before continuing, knowing this was not easy to talk about. "Maybe it's because Remus doesn't want Peter to be alone, because he knows what it's like--on some level. What makes you think that he'll hurt someone? Aside from taking a great deal of pleasure from your pranks. Do you think he's--turning against you? I mean I'd hate to insinuate such things. But--if you have such--a bad feeling about it, have you talked to James or Remus about it? Do you think he'd hurt Marlene or I? Or someone like us on purpose? I've been nothing but nice to him since first year. I only went against you and Potter during your pranks against Severus because, aside from the fact that it's wrong, but also because it wasn't fair. Two against one. I wanted to even the odds against him. I know, when in first year the sorting hat had a bit of what they call a hat-stall. Couldn't decide whether to put me in Gryffindor or Ravenclaw. I chose Gryffindor. The hat, takes your choice into account, Professor Dumbledore explained that to me during first year when I asked why it put me in the house it did, and why it put Severus in the house he got."  It was definitely going to be a long time before she had ever fully trusted certain things.  Or certain individuals yet she trusted Sirius more than she did Potter these days.

She listened to what he said about the map. That map was the most intriguing thing she'd heard about that wasn't attached to a class.  "Perhaps you should not let him have access to the map by himself? That's like--if he's as bad as you say, that's like putting a loaded weapon into the wrong individual's hands. If he knows where his target is. Yes, of course he gets a rise out of Severus being tortured because it's not him getting punished." She listened to what he said about the map. That map was the most intriguing thing she'd heard about that wasn't attached to a class. She smiled a little at Sirius, as he genuinely was nice to be around. "I know, that the map is used for your enjoyment. It's also nice to have to look out for each other in its own way. Also creepy in a certain extent too. What can you do, I mean if you can't trust him? Do you just watch your own back or how does that work given it is clear that your mates, Potter and Remus don't...exactly see things your way? if you need any help, I'm willing to help. I'm--as Professor Slughorn says, quite well when it comes to potions. I also know a bit when it comes to healing spells. Healing is a good skill to have, you know." She was quite sure she could heal any injury so long as it wasn't life-threatening then she'd have to leave that to a professional. 

@black

There were certain ways to have fun that were safer than what a prank could be. Sure, pranks could be harmful just as they had been less so. "I appreciate that, and I know, he would as well. I do believe though that you're right, about nothing is ever easy, if it is, there's something seriously amiss. Having fun, is okay, I'm not saying don't. Change is scary even at the best of times, but it's also worth it when you have something worth it. You have changed, even I can see that. I'm proud of you for that. Because I know that it's not easy. You're not the only one whom has changes to make. I do as well. You've got my support." She knew that Marlene had been helping Sirius, the way she helped so many others before. She liked to see the change in Sirius. Knowing that it was going to bring him closer to not just herself but to Marlene especially.

"I understand, I do. My mother--she taught me to always see the good in others over everything, even the bad. It doesn't mean that an individual is not bad, because some are, but there's good too, hidden far underneath the surface. Sometimes, so much that one cannot see the good within." A sigh formed upon her lips. She worried far too much for those she cared for, no matter how difficult it was sometimes. "I realize, that now, you can't force others to change if they choose not to do it for themselves. Peter may be harmless, but if you can't trust him, then just keep an eye on him. If he so much as tries anything stupid, I'll have to use one of my own tactics on him. And believe you me, that may not be wise on his part. It's disturbing to even think he'd be one to view those like myself--women and girls as play things--like we're meat is beyond reproach. I'll most certainly be on alert with him around. Regardless if you, Remus or even Potter are nearby."

It was true that it was creepy to a certain extent, if what Sirius said about Peter was true. "That's still amazing that you've got your own copy of it. That you did so much of it. Quite incredible. Not to mention more advanced, than most would even imagine. It's--impressive. How you four managed to accomplish such a feat. I realize you and Potter have had each other's backs since day one. Usually wherever one is, the other isn't too far behind. Not everyone sees things the same." When Sirius talked about the map, she was actually quite surprised but impressed all the same. The idea of him giving her the copy of the map, was awesome.

With it she could keep an eye on the boys, and Severus. It'd help immensely with her prefect duties. Though she wouldn't abuse the privileges of it. She just would have to do what was right, by the use of it. Not use it just to make others miserable. "Marlene is the only one I'd share anything like this with. I'm fine with you having to do whatever you need to do so that I can use it. What kind of runes are there?" She said though she was simply curious. She knew that runes like what he was describing were something that would obviously be used to protect something important. "You'll have to show me how it works."

@black